Sunday, February 23, 2014

What is Your Self Worth?

     Just this week I had a conversation with my children about self worth.  Self worth is the amount of respect you have for yourself.  Growing into an adult, our children face those who would rather strip them of  their confidences instead of stepping into positive roles.  Excuses may come from their parents, "They're just kids, they don't realize what they are saying."  Or maybe a negative influence is the only influence that other child observes from their parents.  Irregardless, even a child knows what behavior is acceptable and what is not.

     Explaining to my children that when an individual tries to tear you down, more than likely the root of their negativity stems from their own insecurities.  They may lack confidence in areas where you do not or they are afraid to step out of their box and try to keep you in the confines of your own.  My main point to my kids is that no individual can bring you down unless YOU let them.   

     Listening to my own words, I recognized the fact that this behavior does not stop once we are graduated from the hallways of our local schools.   There are some that continue to take this behavior into adulthood.   I cannot tell my children it ends when they grow up, because the facts are, it does not.

     Attending the #BOOM event in Columbia, MO, this past Friday, hosted by Dr. Sean Siebert, I was struck with the fact that I sometimes get caught up in my own challenges and forget that others are facing adversities of their own.  Sitting in a room full of  entrepreneurs brought me back to my conversation with my children.  How many times have these creative minds been told, no?  How many times have they been told their ideas are worthless?  Yet they believe in themselves enough to continue on the right paths.  

     They, just like us, have faced those boss's, co-workers, acquaintances or school bullies that show no respect to anyone.  Taking a moment to assess their situation, we can observe that their reality, is that these bullies actually have no respect for themselves.  Their self worth is so low that they deflect it onto us to avoid digging down deep and fixing the root of their problems.  As with children, many adults root problem is jealousy.  

     Society has us measuring our self worth by materialistic assets.  Starting as a child, "my bike is better than yours", as a teenager, you cannot be popular unless you have brand name clothing and as an adult, it is how large your house is, etc.   Gauging the respect we have for ourselves should be based on our daily living.  A strong question for each of us would be, " What have I done today to make myself proud?"  This is at least what I teach to my children.  

     I know we cannot stop the "nastiness" of some people who try to spread their misery everywhere, what we can control is how we let it affect ourselves.  Our attitudes. Our self worth.  I hope my children take this lesson they lived this week and use it as they grow.

     Anyone can exercise the right to ask us, "What is your self worth"?  We, as individuals, are the only ones who have the right to that answer.  If our answer does not make us proud, then for the love of Pete, let's get off our duffs and do something about it!
    
“We cannot think of being acceptable to others until we have first proven acceptable to ourselves.”
Malcolm X