How did I decide on the title for my blog,
Stronger than Yesterday?
Short Version: these were the only words I could quote to myself for a year after my unfortunate collision.
Long Version: I invariably envisioned myself as a good sympathizer, yet there are some things a person must experience for themselves to understand the full impact of complete devastation.
Things that make you hurt in places you didn't know you had.
It is true that the grieving process begins to lessen after that first year. That is, if you grab on tight & make a decision that you are going to live instead of letting that hurt control you.
Many times I could only concentrate on hours at a time, over a period, those hours became full days. The same question berating my conscious moment after moment. "Am I going to be Okay"? I don't recall purposely asking this, yet it managed to work it's way into my thoughts constantly. I spoke with God each day, never asking why, only asking that same boomerang question. Once shouting, "Say Something"! I collected myself and accepted authority of my life.
I disagree that God wants you to let it all be in His hands. He gave me a swift kick in the pants. All I had to do was shut up and let Him talk. I chose to listen and save myself.
Today as I sip my flavored hot coffee, staring at my lit Christmas tree from top to bottom, I recognize that this will be the third holiday season that I will not be able to walk due to surgeries.
As my eyes travel down the tree, they stop at the memories hanging on branches. I smile. It just doesn't matter. I am here to add more precious memories to our tree with my family. I survived, I fought, I didn't give up.
Life should be simple, yet sometimes we let it be hard. It may be the only thing you can say on some days, but it is enough. If we keep trying, then we are Stronger than Yesterday.
From start to now! Who knew I would be able to raft?
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This, I believe, is the third time I have started a blog in the
last two years. It has meandered around in my mind, but life, or
should I say, surgeries, has found my attention instead.
Those that know me are asking, " You're blogging? About what?"
Yeah, who knew? I wouldn't say me, but the last three years have given
me new insight to myself. I've had soooooo much time to figure out who
I am, what I think about myself & life and what I want to
accomplish after this last recovery.
If I am new to
you then you are wondering why I am talking about surgeries &
recovery and why I want to blog about my life. Short version: nearly
three years ago, on a Wednesday evening, a person that I did not know,
made a mistake in judgement. He decided to drink & drive. He did
not drive in his path, he drove in mine. Three years, eleven
surgeries & so much physical therapy later, I am on my way to
finally recovering.
Although my entire blog will not be
about my experiences regarding this, I would like to take you on my
journey since this has happened. I have evolved into a better being,
learned valuable lessons about life & myself & would love to
share them with those that are interested.
I also
have many topics that I am crazy about. I would like to teach &
share some of these with you.
Being a photographer, I have knowledge
that you want and I am willing to share! I envision a lesson a month
with photo assignments. Cooking & baking, mmmmmmmmmmm. Food
that makes your mouth water and makes your bum bigger! Learning to
live frugally these past years has brought me to make most of our food
from scratch, along with cleaning products. Couponing. Hunting &
fishing. I love to talk about our farm & the work it entails. Our
horses............... beautiful creatures. Reading. Crafting. Well,
just about anything.
So you can see who you are reading about I inserted a photo of my son & I. He is my Favorite Son! (never mind that he is my only son, that's not the point)
So, as this is my introduction to
my blogging adventure, I invite you to share a few moments with me each
week. Each week may not interest you specifically, but come back &
check on me sometime.
