Canning Garden Fresh Jalapenos

     I tend to plant my garden a little later than most.  I plant in late May for two reasons.  One, it seems we always have at least one late frost and I'm not that person who covers up her garden for protection.  Two, I do not want the garden to be ready for harvest during our county fair when we are busy for seven days.  That being said, my garden has been plentiful for a few weeks now and of course it seems that all of the veggies gang up on me and are ready to pick at the same time.

     I enjoy canning until I get so overwhelmed I beg the plants to just wilt up already, but it's not in me to just let them go.  Hearing the pop of the lid sealing, viewing all of my hard work on the shelves and eating organic food that I grew in the dead of winter makes it all worth it.  

     Pickles, tomato juice, sauce, pasta sauce, ro-tel, salsa, green beans and jalapenos are the bulk of my summer canning.  Jalapenos are one of the easiest to can.  My husband and I enjoy spicing up our foods and although I have frozen some of the peppers, I tend to stick to canning them.  It seems they stay crisper that way.  

     Canning them can be as easy as slicing them up and putting them in a jar and filling it with hot water, maybe a half a teaspoon of salt, if you wish.

*jalapenos 
*hot water
*1/2 tsp. salt per jar(optional)

     I save my jars from the grocery store and use them 3-4 times before discarding them.   If canned correctly those lids will seal just like the Ball jar lids and you've already paid for them once so use them as long as you can.

     Note:  when canning a large batch it is imperative that you wear rubber gloves.   I didn't even give it a thought until my fingers felt like they had flames  shooting out the ends of them because the oils from the jalapenos has soaked into the pores of my skin.   You know, our skin is the largest organ we have and the most absorbent.  So here is me, dancing around the kitchen trying anything and everything to get the burning to stop, chastising myself for such silliness.  I will only have to make that mistake once in my lifetime.  

     I like to put my  jars and lids in the dishwasher before canning.  This sanitizes them but it also heats them so I don't have to add another pot to my stove.  Also if I am canning small portions, I heat my water in the microwave instead of stove top as well.

   So, heat your jars and lids, make sure the water in your canner is heating while you are preparing your jalapenos by slicing them.  I slice them into rings.  I also leave in the seeds and ribs, you can remove them if you do not want as much heat.   Another note:  the longer you leave them sealed in the jar the more heat the peppers will produce.  Now I've been told how good they are sliding down the gullet and I've also been told how they set you on fire while passing through the poop shoot.  I suggest putting the date on the jar and if it's been over six months, that person is choosing that risk on their own.  No fault of yours!
 
     Add the peppers to your jars and do not overfill.  I had to remove a few from the tops of my jars. 
     
  


  I like to add a clove of garlic to each jar as well.


     













     Add 1 cup apple cider vinegar to 3 cups water and boil in microwave or on stove.

     Next ladle it in your jars until the peppers are covered.  I would use a funnel, unlike I did in this photo and it will end up in the jar instead of all over your counter.

Set those jars in your hot canning water, pop on the canner lid and set your timer for 20 minutes.   After 20 minutes turn your burner off and when your pop up valve drops you may remove the lid (away from you) so the steam does not melt your face off and peek inside.

    Definitely using your jar grabber would be a smart choice and place them on a thick towel or pot holder.





I then, cover the jars with a couple of heavy towels and allow them to cool gradually.  After and hour or so you will start to hear the lids "popping", which means they have sealed.

     We will use these for salads, soups, chili, sandwiches or whatever I want to add a little heat to.   But I do enjoy the adding flavor to my peppers instead of just canning them with plain water.  It really isn't difficult and if you enjoy pesticide free veggies, growing your own is the way to go.

Recipe:

• canning jars/lids
• canner
• jalapenos
• 3 cups H2O
• 1 cup apple cider vinegar
• garlic gloves

I say "Fahrvergnügen!"

     Many years ago, I started calling my kids, my little Fahrvergnügen's. (Fahr. Verg! Gnü. Gen)  I don't know why I did this really, I know I just enjoyed the pronunciation of the word.  So it started with Liv, progressed to Drew and again when I added Hayley and Mackenzie to my family.  They are all my little fahrvergnügen's.

     Some fifteen years later, I cannot remember where I retrieved this term from.  With some hard thinking, I surmised I took it from a television commercial. Nearing the age of thirty-nine with four teen kids and going through premature menopause, I was not quite sure I should trust that recollection or not.  This week, I decided to indulge into some internet researching, not only to prove I can still remember things, but to really find out what the meaning of this word is.  I mean, what if for fifteen years I have been calling my kids something morally wrong? 

     As it turns out my memory is still intact.  Fahrvergnügen is a German word.  That's kind of obvious, not only by the spelling, but also the pronunciation. It is a term used as an advertising slogan used by the German automobile manufacturer Volkswagen in a 1990 U.S. ad campaign, that included a stick figure driving a Volkswagen car.  Now, my first child was not born until 1998, so that commercial was either extremely popular to run that long, or Volkswagen had run out of ideas for almost a decade. 

      One of the tag lines incorporating the word was: "Fahrvergnügen: It's what makes a car a Volkswagen."

 
     The English meaning is:driving enjoyment

 











  It has been incorporated into my daily word use, not always used in the same fashion though.  I use it loosely, actually.  When the kids were small I would use it endearingly, " Oh my precious fahrvergnügen", meaning my little angel.

     As they turned older  "you little Fahrvergnügen" as in, you silly.

Then, "Ahhhhh, you are all Fahrvergnügen's!", meaning you little devils! At some point I moved past the kids and used it in replacement of all kinds of other words.  Maybe I'd make and mistake and mutter, "Well Fahrvergnügen!"  (well shucks!) 
 
  Maybe my husband was aggravating me, "YOU are a Fahrvergnügen" ( a butt )


I would somehow cause myself pain, "Oh Fahrvergnügen!!!!!!!!!!!!"  mmmmmm   hmmmmmmm

 So I say, I am pleased that all of this time I was calling my kids a type of enjoyment. Maybe for future use, I should understand the meaning of word I intend to use out of context.  Just in case.

  

Have You Thought of Natural Pain Relief?

 Pain.
Pain..........pain....................pain............pain.........pain...........pain.......
pain, pain,
pain,pain,pain,pain,pain,pain,pain,pain,pain,pain,pain,pain,pain,pain,
Pain Sucks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


     Everyone has pain and when we do, whatever pain it is, feels like the worst we've experienced.  Most of our pain is short lived.  Give it a little time to heal or to allow the medicines to take effect and most diminish within days or weeks.  Chronic pain is a different ball game.

 It never leaves.  Ever.  

     There may be days that are  more tolerable than others, but anything can cause it to intensify.   Then it feels as if little can be done to reduce it.  That is without taking a prescribed pain reliever and who wants to pop narcotics for the rest of their life?   I, for one, do not. 
      I understand too much about pain.  Living thirty-five healthy years, at age thirty-eight, I can no longer summon memories of what it felt like to live pain free.  Visions of a time when I could run or jump with the kids in the yard come to mind, but when I see my feet hit the ground, I physically cringe.  I can only associate those activities with the pain it would cause me now.  Even while watching movies, I find myself reacting in this same manner.

     Trying to give an explanation of how intense my pain has been has been a trial for me.  When asked, I just cannot find the descriptive words to encompass it.  I may never.  I fancied myself a good sympathizer before my collision and now realize some experiences are beyond words, beyond comprehension.  I lived it and there are moments when even I cannot believe I came through.

    
      With the dedication of my physicians, they have compressed my agony to severe discomfort.  I had to take it from there.  Doctors can only accomplish so much with what they have to work with and if I did not want to continue with narcotics, then I had to research other options. 

     So how am I accomplishing this?

     I want you to know that if you suffer from chronic pain, there are options, but you must be diligent in your efforts.  You may understand already that if you suffer from this condition that you build up a certain tolerance.  If your pain lowers to a certain level, you are elated.  Humans have a tendency to become lazy.  When we feel better, we stop doing what makes us feel better.  Then what happens?  We feel bad again.  Then we scramble to start again what made us feel better in the first place.  So why not just make it a life habit and stick to it?

     I exercise many habits each day to minimize my injuries.  I do not allow myself to become stagnant in my own care.  I grasp too well that when you let pain have control, it takes twice as long to reign it in.  

     Acceptance is my first defense.   I cannot move forward if I am not mentally and emotionally prepared.  

     Diet.  I eat well and I eat healthy.  I minimize what I call 'heavy' foods.  (gravy, fried)  I look for detoxing foods.

     Vitamins.  I take a herbal detoxing vitamin that is a combination of fruits and vegetables. Greens

    

        
   Exercise.  Activity is a double edged sword for me.  I need it because my body will seize up and become rigid without it.   Too much and I am resting on the couch for days.  Pilates  cycling and farm work.

     Meditation.  I don't sit cross legged and 'Ohm' in the middle of the living room, that's for sure.  With four kids, I'd never hear the end of those jokes.  I do, however, sit in a quiet place, with my legs elevated and mentally motivate myself to overcome the deep aching that takes place with humidity or over-activity on my part.

    Curamin.  This herbal supplement is known for its ability to balance the body's natural inflammatory response.   I use this as my main pain reliever.  I must take the maximum dose and take it daily.  

     Rhus Tox. This is actually poison oak.   I know!  Odd, I thought, especially since I am allergic, but I have had no side effects of rash, etc.  This, I use for my arthritis.  Rhus Tox is a homeopathic remedy.  Homeopathic means that you are using a small amount of a natural substance to treat an ailment that the substance would normally cause.  Foods for Health

    The combination of those last two supplements have been helping me since February and rarely do I even have to ingest an Ultram.  Unless I over do it.

     SMILE.   That's the most important habit of all!  Luckily that comes naturally for me.  I welcome the lines that have developed around my eyes, it lets myself and others know that I've lived a life full of happiness.  Smiling, in earnest, is uplifting.  Just try it for yourself.  If you smile repeatedly, you feel something grow in your chest  and it is impossible not to have your spirit and emotions improve.  It may not decrease your pain or fix the situation you are encountering.  Do it anyway.  What is does, is helps you handle it better and smile lines are much more attractive than frown lines.  Yes?

Smile On!

The Value of Sisterhood

     The value of sisterhood is something to be treasured for a life time.  Not all of us understand having that, but we can come close with friends that feel like sisters.  Having three daughters, there are times I envy their hushed talks, their secret smiles and overall sister camaraderie.  Having one sibling who is male, the only hushed talks we had, were episodes of him begging me not to tell our parents "something" he had done, so he wouldn't get into trouble.  ;)

     This photo shoot I am sharing has been evolving in my thoughts for a couple of years.  Because of many surgeries I have not been able to tackle this passion of mine, until Now!  Since we camp at the fairgrounds we had access to the carnival rides from our county fair and I thought this the perfect background to portray our three beauties.  

     If you have not noticed, the 50's fashion is back in style, with a contemporary spin of course.  Finding the right kind of outfits wasn't too much of a challenge.

   Studying our three daughters, I pronounced they were at the right age to help me with this endeavor.  Luckily all three readily agreed to trust my imagination.  

     When our girls filed out of the camper one by one, I had that moment the rest of you, who have watched them grow up had.  "When did all THAT happen?"  My heavens, they are stunning!  When were the little girls replaced with these remarkable young women?  I am even more stoked for this photo shoot, they are 100% all into this.  Hair, makeup and clothing.  Sweeeet!


     Photo after photo, my chest puffs with pride as I can see things differently through the lens of a camera.  Photo after photo, the lump in my throat swells as I see we only have a few years left before they leave.  Photo after photo, I hide the fresh tears of appreciation I have for these dazzling, intelligent, young ladies. 

   They were rocking this session and I was enjoying it as much as they were.  They are veteran models as I have put a camera in their face for many years.  I only had to tweak poses as they did the rest.

   I couldn't help but laugh at memories of younger years as I studied them.  They don't care about the sibling hierarchy anymore, they just want to borrow each others clothes.  There is still an occasional, "She made me do it" or "Sissy did it" or better yet, " I am the oldest, so I am the boss!"

       Our family combined nine years ago.  They didn't have a choice of whether they wanted to become sisters, but now I can hear them say, "I smile because you're my sister and there is nothing you can do about it."  

      They have grown to love and protect each other.  Confide secrets and ambitions.  We have raised them together and even though they are flowers from different gardens, they have bloomed together and developed a sisterhood that is powerful.   This is an affection worth treasuring.

How lucky are they?

Breakfast/Dessert: Healthier Peach Gratin

Healthier Peach Gratin

Prep:15 minutes

4 Medium Peaches 2 Eggs 1 Maple syrup(lite) 1/2 cup All-purpose flour 1/4 tsp Salt(optional) 2 tbsp Sugar(sweetener) 1tsp Sugar (sweetener) 1/2 tsp Vanilla 1/2 cup Granola with almonds/pecans 2 tbsp Butter(optional) 1/2 cup Greek yogurt, plain 1/2 cup Milk

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 425 degrees F. In a medium bowl whisk together milk and eggs. Add flour, the 2 tablespoons sugar, the melted butter, vanilla, and salt, whisking until smooth. Set aside.
2. If desired, peel peaches. Pit and slice peaches.
3. Grease a 9- to 10-inch deep-dish pie plate. Pour batter into pie plate. Arrange peach slices on top of batter.
4. Bake for 20 minutes. Sprinkle with granola. Bake for 5 to 10 minutes more or until batter is light brown and set and peaches are tender. Let cool for 20 minutes before serving.
5. In a small bowl stir together yogurt and enough additional sugar to reach desired sweetness.  Drizzle with maple syrup and yogurt mixture.

     We have a fairly healthy home diet, I would say.  There are very few convenience foods in our pantry so if you were searching for any Little Debbie snacks, you would be out of luck.  Most meals, these days are made from scratch or close to it.  (which my family loves just as much!)

     The majority of our family is on a health kick the past couple of months, so since I'm the cook, the others don't have a choice!  We also have one who is trying out a vegetarian status right now, which makes me look even more diligently for healthier alternatives.  

     Trying to change up breakfast a bit and since my thoughtful husband brought home some Georgia peaches from our oldest daughter's recent college trip, naturally I searched how to revamp my normal recipes into healthier versions.   

     Taking a recipe from my Great Grandmother's cook book, I swapped out most of the butter or Lard!(some would probably have to look up the definition that word & gasp) , no crust on top, change the sugar to sweetener & the drizzled icing to yogurt. 

                                                                                      

  The base reminds me of a custard.  I am a big fan of vanilla and I used 1 tsp instead of just 1/2 tsp.

Wedge the peaches, place in the base of the dish until you have used all four or to your desired amount.

You can omit the syrup if you wish, we had some lite syrup so, why not?   It's not always abstinence, it's moderation.  Drizzle on as much or as little as you like, although I would not cover the entire dish.  I think that may give you a belly ache, of sorts.




     Using the granola/pecans gives the dish a little more substance and add some fiber and protein in there.  It is a substitution for the original pie crust.  Now I seem to have neglected photographing the drizzling of the yogurt over the top, but I loved the sweet flavor it added.  Instead of a powdered sugar glaze, you can add 1 tsp to some vanilla yogurt (  I think the yogurt is sweet enough on it's own)but you can add it if you wish.

   You end up with a sweet, but healthier breakfast/dessert.  You won't have to feel guilty or sit at the table holding your belly because the heaviness of the dish made you sick to your stomach.

Our Crawford County Fair Family

     Most of us have some sort of extended family.  Although we may not get to spend much time with them, we know they will always step up to the plate when we are in need.

     My husband and I have quite a list that we consider our extended family.  Whole communities have shown their support during our need over the last three years.   Sharing this story of our local fair family and how they pulled together to show their support for us still gets me all choked up.  Fair time is just around the corner and speaking of this instance just last week, filled my chest with overflowing gratitude towards the amount of people in our community that can rally, when one of it's members is down.

     Nearly seven months had passed since our collision,  I had

already completed, I believe, five surgeries on my pelvis and bilateral ankles.  Just a couple of weeks prior I had learned to take my first steps using a walker and had progressed to using a walker with wheels!   What was equally as exciting was that I put on a pair of shoes for the first time in six months!  The ominous wheelchair was still in my life, but fair time was too rugged for that cheap seat to functional properly at the fair grounds.

    I refused to make our kids miss showing their livestock animals that year.  I did not want my condition to continue to dictate the activities of my family.  We could also use a "pick me up" by letting the kids have some fun and doing a little socializing ourselves.  I could endure two trips to the swine barn a day or I could sit on my blue Yamaha, four-wheelin' walker and let the kids take turns pushing me.  If I recollect correctly, it was only 117 degrees that July, which helped none with my already massively swollen ankles.  All week our family received well wishes, hugs and sincere compassion from all who knew us.  

  

   The moment that took the cake was Saturday's livestock sale.  I sat next to the sale ring waiting for our kids to emerge one by one with their animals.  Our middle two daughters won the top two awards in the swine division, it was our high light of the week!

       As our second oldest walked the ring with her pig, I had one camera in my left hand taking a video and another camera in my right hand snapping photos.  I was being a "Mom" and loudly whispering for her to smile and look at the crowd when I finally heard the auctioneer say that she had set a record.  

     What?!  I was so busy juggling my cameras and insisting my daughter keep a smile on her face that I hadn't heard a single word the auctioneer had said.  Both cameras stopped following my daughter as I turned my head to the right to view the crowd.  I viewed a mass of people, but I didn't see a single face. 

      My vision had tremendously blurred with the turning of my head as my mind wrapped around what these wonderful friends of ours had  just done.  My lips parted in awe as I swung my head to the left to find my husband leaning against a wall with his hands stuck deep in his pockets.  

     His eyes were swimming with un-shed tears, that was my confirmation that I understood what was transpiring.  I held his stare for so long that he walked  over, knelt down beside me and wiped the tears from my cheeks ever so gently with his calloused knuckles.  "Carey, these are good people," he said softly.  Indeed you are, friends, indeed you are. 

     $17 a pound that piece of pork brought on that hot, humid day.  My daughter had no trouble keeping that smile from enveloping her entire face. To top it off, the hog was donated back to be auctioned off, this time to help with medical expenses!    

     I made an inept attempt to focus on the rest of the sale, but it was a futile one.  My emotions overwhelmed me as I sat in my lawn chair staring blankly, still in awe.  Leaving the show pavilion, an acquaintance said in earnest, "Carey, the 2011 Crawford County Fair is the start to a better second half of this year."  I believed that with all of my heart.  

     Looking back, I'm not sure how I even attended that fair or survived through the pain that it cost me.  Your can bet your bottom that I wouldn't have traded that moment for one pain free day.  It was a turning point, a boost our family needed, but never would have asked for.  That is what friends do best.   We couldn't be more proud to be a part of a community like this.  

We love our Crawford County Fair Family!

Photography: Rule of Thirds

     The Rule of Thirds is by far my Favorite rule of photography.  I naturally gravitate to using it in the horizontal format, but it can be equally as pleasing shot vertically.

     When applying this concept, the subject of the photo will not be in the center, but off to one side or the other.  The image is divided into thirds both horizontally and vertically.  This creates four intersecting points.  When the focal point of your picture is aligned with one of these points, you are applying the rule of thirds.

 

  You can view that she is in the right 3rd of the horizontal photograph, but also pretty close to the lower 3rd vertically as well.

  

     Here she is without the grid lines and the photograph is much more dramatic without the subject being centered directly in the middle of the image.(isn't she gorgeous?!)

 

     Same type of scenario with this beautiful cousin of mine, only centered in the left 3rd of the photograph.  We are naturally drawn to this image because of the composition,(rule of thirds), both by our eye and by emotion.

     Using this composition creates an impact to our images.  It becomes beautiful and a work of art and not just another ordinary "picture".  We may involuntarily part our lips or give a slight gasp when an image evokes emotion in us.  When you view your favorite image of someone or something, ask yourself why you enjoy it so much.  Emotion, I tell you!  All of this is due to composition!

       I do have a few vertical examples.  What is the subject of this image?  The railroad tracks.  They disappear into the fall colors of the trees.  They are not in the center of the photograph, are they?  They are in the lower third, this is more appealing to the eye.

      Phenomenal sunset.  How you choose to photograph it is up to you.  I chose to put the horizon in the lower third, the clouds and crescent moon aren't exactly on the intersecting point, but that's okay.  They are in the general area of the left third of the photograph as well.

     Using this rule is one of the easiest to learn concerning photography.  You do not have to purchase an amazing camera,  you can use a point and shoot camera, phone camera, it doesn't matter.  No crazy exposures to think about, just composition.  Now the hard part is making it a habit when you do take your camera out.  You will have to intentionally think about it for a while, then like anything else, it will evolve into your everyday photography.  Six months from now, go back through your photographs and see if there is any change in your composition, you could be pleasantly surprised.

     This is a fantastic concept to use for photography competitions as well.  You want your image to stand out from the rest of the images, correct?   Use this, I promise, it works.  Since it is fair time, all of you 4H'ers could practice this for your club entries.  Be a step ahead of the rest and make that judge stop in front of your photograph and get that blue ribbon!  For the rest of us, amateurs and pro's, it's just good practice.

Happy Shooting!

(photographers will not take offense to that greeting)

Developing Future Leaders, One FFA Member at a Time

     Many schools enjoy an FFA or Agriculture curriculum, that is if it can still find funding.  Many misinterpret this program as just a livestock or "blow off" program.   There are some, I'm sure, that use it for those purposes, but then there are some that take a deeper interest  and learn this programs motto and it's core values.

     We ended the school year in 2016 with many banquets/ceremonies and the FFA Banquet was among them.  Our two oldest children are involved and will sit in an office position starting next school year.  Each member played a part in the ceremony, relaying to their audience, the FFA creed and motto.  My husband and I listened to their words and wondered if each student took the time to really read and recognize the magnitude of what they were communicating to us.  Not likely, I know, as each member was just trying to get through their paragraph eloquently.

The FFA Creed

I believe in the future of agriculture, with a faith born not of words but of deeds - achievements won by the present and past generations of agriculturists; in the promise of better days through better ways, even as the better things we now enjoy have come to us from the struggles of former years.

I believe that to live and work on a good farm, or to be engaged in other agricultural pursuits, is pleasant as well as challenging; for I know the joys and discomforts of agricultural life and hold an inborn fondness for those associations which, even in hours of discouragement, I cannot deny.

I believe in leadership from ourselves and respect from others. I believe in my own ability to work efficiently and think clearly, with such knowledge and skill as I can secure, and in the ability of progressive agriculturists to serve our own and the public interest in producing and marketing the product of our toil.

I believe in less dependence on begging and more power in bargaining; in the life abundant and enough honest wealth to help make it so--for others as well as myself; in less need for charity and more of it when needed; in being happy myself and playing square with those whose happiness depends upon me.

I believe that American agriculture can and will hold true to the best traditions of our national life and that I can exert an influence in my home and community which will stand solid for my part in that inspiring task.

     Breaking that apart, I interpret several key factors:

• "actions speak louder than words"
• we learn from our predecessor's achievements AND mistakes
• that we can actually enjoy an activity Outdoors and not just an activity that involves our thumbs (PS3/smart phone)
• respect for ourselves and others
• independence  
• community involvement

     These members learn a plethora of skills that they will take with them to the path of college and into adulthood.  Some of the key components in the FFA motto are to promote self confidence, intelligent choices, team work, human relations, social interaction, positive attitudes, encourages excellence, builds character, volunteerism and citizenship.   This group of individuals still proudly state the Pledge of the Allegiance!  

     So as my husband and I sat on the cafeteria seats and watched our daughters receive their awards, we couldn't have been more proud that they chose to be involved in the FFA Chapter  at St. James High School.  Using this program to it's full potential will instill our youth with quality leadership skills and many will develop the confidence to become competent, young entrepreneurs while utilizing the proficiencies they learned by being involved in this wonderful organization.

     Why wouldn't we want them to join this program?  These youth are our future leaders, let's teach them that hard work, compassion and independence is not a trait of the past!!!

Motto

The FFA motto gives members twelve short words to live by as they experience the opportunities in the organization.
Learning to Do, Doing to Learn, Earning to Live, Living to Serve.

    

 

     

I "Get" to Versus I "Have" To

     Life's happiness is all about our perspective.  Our point of view.  Our attitude towards something.  Perspective is our interpretation about life's confrontations.

     After a physically draining week, I took my hormonal children on a short road trip on Mother's Day.  Needing a day to ourselves that was not hurried nor on a timed schedule, felt like a great way to loosen the constraints of hectic lives.

     A two hour drive gave me plenty of time to reflect on the last ten years.  Between the car sick sighs of my daughter and the "Boo Yahs" of my son defeating his Kindle game, I cast back at how we have grown  during this time.  Our collision has definitely changed our family and in viewing us, we have done a good job at not letting it define who we are.  Times have assuredly been hard as our sea of challenges are gradually receding.  We have battled through the storms and the wonderfully gratifying aspect is that we've done it together.  We as a whole refused to allow life's circumstances to rip our family apart.

       Before our tragedy our lives were terribly rushed.  Working overtime, carting kids to practices and events, many of those overlapping each other.  Hugs and kisses were quick as I vaulted one child out the car door to run the other child across town, then to run the three errands I needed before the first one had to be picked up again.   Uniforms to wash, dinner to cook, homework that I didn't understand myself.  Thinking back, I recall hearing myself talk of the tasks I have to do.  I never remember speaking of them as tasks I get to do.  I didn't resent them, there were just so many with so little time that I didn't feel privileged to them anymore.

     My husband and I would often high five in the hallway shouting encouragement to each other.  Our life was happy, but I desired a better quality of time with those that I loved.  I begged myself to find a way to slow down, to be able to hold my children's hand while strolling, not dragging them along because they were walking too slow.  I wanted to flirt with my husband and maybe take a few hours for myself, doing some hobby that I hadn't had time to think about yet.  I wanted time to look at life, remember and enjoy it.

    Now, I asked myself to slow life down, not come to a complete halt. What I could not accomplish on my own had just been handed to me in a frumpy package.  Not exactly how I would have done it, but I suppose I was not specific enough in my prayers.  Beggar's can't be choosers, I suppose. 

     When I began to recover and start tending to my family again, everything I took for granted was blatantly clear.  I had never felt anything like it in my life.  I had searched for this clarity for years.  It took a one ton truck smacking me up the side of my head to give me what I desired.  How selfish of me.  How indebted I am because of it.  

     I have been a glass half full kind of gal instead of a glass half empty, but what if the glass is just twice as big as it needs to be?  That is how my perception has changed.

     I began watching my kids in all of their activities with nothing on my mind except them.  Ingraining every moment into my permanent memory.  I didn't care what else I should be doing or who else wanted my attention. They had all of me.  I hold their gazes and smile, just because I can. 

      I am grateful that I get to hear my children's heckling of each other, I get to see their pouts after being told, "no", I get their smiles as I sit in the stands after they made a great performance, I am even grateful I get to sit through.................Middle School Choir Concerts.    Putting a twist on perspective is that I only have a few more years that I get to deal with raging hormones from three teenage girls and a pre-teen boy.  I know, even this, I will be grateful for, it just may take me a little longer to get to that one. 

     We spend so much time viewing others lives, but how do we view our own?  When we break it down, is it really as dramatic as we think it is?  I say no.   

      KISS.  Keep It Simple Stupid.  Words to implement.  It really is easy if we continue making the effort to keep it so.  Life is wonderful, there is kindness, there is simplicity if you choose to view it as such.

     I am going to steal a quote from Mr. Abraham Lincoln that I would like us all to break down and give thought to.

"We can complain because rose bushes have thorns or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses."   

Getting Back in the Saddle:Don't Give Up

     "If you fall off your horse, get back in the saddle."

     How many of us have heard that quote or it has been expressed to us in a certain situation we are experiencing?

     I know I have.  Both literally and figuratively.  I've grown up riding horses and as a child I have been thrown from my saddle a couple of times.  My Father, ordering me to get back on my horse as I stare at him with a look of dismay, then angry pouting as I put one foot in the stirrup, grab the reins and head back to the barn, because I was done riding at that point. 

Writing this 3 1/2 years into my recovery from a tragic car crash, my heart wanted so badly to get back to my horseback riding. We didn't know if I ever would do to the damage of my legs and the pain they endured because of those injuries.  Walk with me as I relay what a wonderful day my first ride was. 

      Like anyone I would never want to admit my parent was right about anything as an adolescent, but now as an adult, it's clear as parents, we adopt situations as learning lessons.  We use these for our children's betterment and our aspiration is that at a juncture in their lives they will use it themselves.  They will smile as they repeat the words we said to them in their younger years and they will exclaim, " Oh my, I sound like my Mom/Dad!".

     This original quote feels true to myself as I have had to get back on that horse several times in the last three years.  My trauma surgeon informed me in no uncertain terms that I could  lay in a hospital bed, in my living room and never get out of the wheelchair that awaited me.  My other option was to conquer my anxiety, work long and hard and take the chance that my body might fail. 

      But what if I succeeded?

     Choosing to get back in that saddle was the only option for me.  I am fortunate that is my natural response, whether it comes from deep within me or from my upbringing, I don't care.  Succeeding requires this mental attitude.  

     Physically I haven't accomplished activities as I would have before my injuries.  I have learned great patience and creativity.  Looking at the situation and adapting has been my greatest achievement.  The lessons I have cultivated from my tragedy are appreciated.  I have an improved sense of myself because of them.

     It is now not enough to know how to ride, I must know how to fall.  There is an art of keeping a horse between you and the ground.  There is a discipline to recovering.  I must always be thinking ahead,  preparation is key and sometimes I just have to take a risk by sitting in that saddle and say, "Well, let's see what happens."  

     Taking this lesson literally today, I had my husband saddle my horse for me. (it was his horse until I stole it from him)   Three and a half years have passed since I've truly ridden a horse comfortably.  I have a special horse named Jack.

     He stands at 14.2 hands and is a perfect gentleman to me.  Having my pelvis and both ankles fused with loads of metal covering my bones does not make it easy to stretch your leg up to a 15 or 16 hand horse.  Today I was able to mount him unassisted, my first accomplishment, then I was able to insert my right toe into my stirrup for the first time since my fourth ankle surgery, a year and a half ago. 

     I decided to attack this challenge the same way as I had to relearn my physical activities.  One step at a time.  I prepared. 
 I had a special horse.  Special stirrups.

 

Special braces.

(I realize lace up boots are not cool anymore and this is not the epitome of sexiness, but they are necessary.  Don't judge my boots.)

     Jack and I walked for fifteen minutes, so far everything is

 A- Okay.

     Jack is as excited as I am and we are both chomping at the bit to try a trot.  He's a smooth dancing guy, I have to say.  There was just a slight  'tork' on the outside of my right ankle as we progressed. Still going splendidly.  I then realized, 

We are in a Wide. Open. Field.

Oh Yes, I did!

     A slow canter, a faster gallop, then a flat out run!  Jack's mane was whipping in the wind as my spirit soared to new heights.  Waiting and wondering for three and a half years if I would ever be able to experience that feeling again has finally ended.  My smile covered the entire county as I laughed and a tear of happy relief raced from the corner of my right eye.  I don't even know who I whispered, 'Thank You' to, but I am truly thankful.  

      I had a little swag in my hip movement as I rode back to the barn to relay the details of my adventure to my husband.  I should give that credit to Jack though as he was the one who was actually prancing up the drive way creating my swag.

     My heart leaps, knowing that greener pastures are on my horizon and I cannot wait to see what new freedoms I will unlock just by giving it a try.

     By getting back in the saddle, I may encounter failures, 

but what if I Succeed?