Sunday, February 7, 2016

Asshole of the Day!

     Two weeks ago, on a Thursday, I was leaving an appointment an hour from my home when I pulled into a well known fast food establishment.  Already disappointed that this drive through was the last  place I could stop before making the trip back home, I pulled up and both lanes were full of travelers in the same predicament as I. 

   
 It was not a healthy choice and it was busy.  As my turn to speak into the intercom to place my order approached, I noticed there was a pretty long line behind me as well. 

       Sitting in the outside lane, I pulled up and waited for the inner lane to progress so I could merge into the pick up line. Unable to move but a few feet, I hear a female voice radiate from the speaker asking if she could take the next cars order. 

     For a reason unknown to me, I left my window rolled down even though it was only twenty degrees outside and I hear a male voice bark, " If this asshole in front of me would pull up, I'd love to order!"  WTH?

     My lips parted and my eyes opened wide and instinctively I stuck my head out the window and looked behind me, only to have my mouth gape wide open and I now looked incredulously at the car behind me with bug eyes.  WTH?

     For there was a man and his wife that were most definitely in their seventies staring back at ME.  They were talking about ME!  Never, ever, ever has the term "asshole" been directed at me before, at least within my ear shot. 

     Looking ahead of me, I pull up the six inches between myself and a woman driving a brand new Tahoe, only to get a look of WTH? from her!  I am now cursing an elderly man and his elderly wife for having such nasty, impatient attitudes, effectively working myself into a offended tizzy. 

     Approaching the payment window, viewing them in my rear view mirror, I decide that I didn't care if they were ordering for the entire Jeff City football team, I was going to pay for their lunch!  I am "kind of" going to take the high road that even if I couldn't do anything about the dang drive through line, I was going to make an attempt to brighten their day, even if it was somewhat out of spite.  Or a lot out of spite. 

     Smiling as I was handing my debit card to the ladies on
the opposite side of the window, I instruct them that this "asshole" would like to pay for the "gentleman's" order behind me.  Humored shock crossed their faces as they both burst out with "awww, good for you for honey".   Yeah, yeah, high road.

     Driving away, I hear a couple of honks paired with a big wave from the gray haired couple to the rear of me.  Instead of flying my free bird, I also give a big wave to accept their thank you.  

     Pulling back onto the highway, my thoughts were of hoping they learned a lesson of patience and kindness because it really was no fault of my own.  

     Then I speculated that it was a good possibility that they were thinking they were the ones who taught ME a lesson.   So I was like, WTH?
 whatever.